Happy 2005!

Last day of 2004!!!
Hmm..no special feelings today..no mood also..partly influenced by the tsunamis disaster ba..sigh..
Going to celebrate hf’s birthday tonight..was looking forward to it as I really want to like plan a really nice celebration with the rest for her..but really apologetic to postpone the meeting time due to the responsibility I have to fulfil at home. I know I got to be there. If not, I am really bad and irresponsible. Anyway..that’s me..
I would usually type out my new year resolutions but this year I want a change..hence..this change starts from here.. I am not going to publish them here..haha..lame.
Complex personality..hmmm..i supposed I have..cos I myself don’t seem to be able to understand myself sometimes..not to say my friends. Trains of thoughts here and there…too tired.. Anyway..

HAPPY 2005 TO ALL IN ADVANCE!

mY peRSonality~ pretty trUe

Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging

Beneath the quiet exterior, INFJs hold deep convictions about the weightier matters of life. Those who are activists -- INFJs gravitate toward such a role -- are there for the cause, not for personal glory or political power.
INFJs are champions of the oppressed and downtrodden. They often are found in the wake of an emergency, rescuing those who are in acute distress. INFJs may fantasize about getting revenge on those who victimize the defenseless. The concept of 'poetic j ustice' is appealing to the INFJ.
"There's something rotten in Denmark." Accurately suspicious about others' motives, INFJs are not easily led. These are the people that you can rarely fool any of the time. Though affable and sympathetic to most, INFJs are selective about their friends . Such a friendship is a symbiotic bond that transcends mere words.
INFJs have a knack for fluency in language and facility in communication. In addition, nonverbal sensitivity enables the INFJ to know and be known by others intimately.
Writing, counseling, public service and even politics are areas where INFJs frequently find their niche.
Functional Analysis
Introverted iNtuitionIntroverted intuitives, INFJs enjoy a greater clarity of perception of inner, unconscious processes than all but their INTJ cousins. Just as SP types commune with the object and "live in the here and now" of the physical world, INFJs readily grasp the hidden psychological stimuli behind the more observable dynamics of behavior and affect. Their amazing ability to deduce the inner workings of the mind, will and emotions of others gives INFJs their reputation as prophets and seers. Unlike the confining, routinizing nature of introverted sensing, introverted intuition frees this type to act insightfully and spontaneously as unique solutions arise on an event by event basis.
Extraverted FeelingExtraverted feeling, the auxiliary deciding function, expresses a range of emotion and opinions of, for and about people. INFJs, like many other FJ types, find themselves caught between the desire to express their wealth of feelings and moral conclusions about the actions and attitudes of others, and the awareness of the consequences of unbridled candor. Some vent the attending emotions in private, to trusted allies. Such confidants are chosen with care, for INFJs are well aware of the treachery that can reside in the hearts of mortals. This particular combination of introverted intuition and extraverted feeling provides INFJs with the raw material from which perceptive counselors are shaped.
Introverted ThinkingThe INFJ's thinking is introverted, turned toward the subject. Perhaps it is when the INFJ's thinking function is operative that he is most aloof. A comrade might surmise that such detachment signals a disillusionment, that she has also been found lacking by the sardonic eye of this one who plumbs the depths of the human spirit. Experience suggests that such distancing is merely an indication that the seer is hard at work and focusing energy into this less efficient tertiary function.
Extraverted SensingINFJs are twice blessed with clarity of vision, both internal and external. Just as they possess inner vision which is drawn to the forms of the unconscious, they also have external sensing perception which readily takes hold of worldly objects. Sensing, however, is the weakest of the INFJ's arsenal and the most vulnerable. INFJs, like their fellow intuitives, may be so absorbed in intuitive perceiving that they become oblivious to physical reality. The INFJ under stress may fall prey to various forms of immediate gratification. Awareness of extraverted sensing is probably the source of the "SP wannabe" side of INFJs. Many yearn to live spontaneously; it's not uncommon for INFJ actors to take on an SP (often ESTP) role.

INFJs are distinguished by both their complexity of character and the unusual range and depth of their talents. Strongly humanitarian in outlook, INFJs tend to be idealists, and because of their J preference for closure and completion, they are generally "doers" as well as dreamers. This rare combination of vision and practicality often results in INFJs taking a disproportionate amount of responsibility in the various causes to which so many of them seem to be drawn.
INFJs are deeply concerned about their relations with individuals as well as the state of humanity at large. They are, in fact, sometimes mistaken for extroverts because they appear so outgoing and are so genuinely interested in people -- a product of the Feeling function they most readily show to the world. On the contrary, INFJs are true introverts, who can only be emotionally intimate and fulfilled with a chosen few from among their long-term friends, family, or obvious "soul mates." While instinctively courting the personal and organizational demands continually made upon them by others, at intervals INFJs will suddenly withdraw into themselves, sometimes shutting out even their intimates. This apparent paradox is a necessary escape valve for them, providing both time to rebuild their depleted resources and a filter to prevent the emotional overload to which they are so susceptible as inherent "givers." As a pattern of behavior, it is perhaps the most confusing aspect of the enigmatic INFJ character to outsiders, and hence the most often misunderstood -- particularly by those who have little experience with this rare type.
Due in part to the unique perspective produced by this alternation between detachment and involvement in the lives of the people around them, INFJs may well have the clearest insights of all the types into the motivations of others, for good and for evil. The most important contributing factor to this uncanny gift, however, are the empathic abilities often found in Fs, which seem to be especially heightened in the INFJ type (possibly by the dominance of the introverted N function).
This empathy can serve as a classic example of the two-edged nature of certain INFJ talents, as it can be strong enough to cause discomfort or pain in negative or stressful situations. More explicit inner conflicts are also not uncommon in INFJs; it is possible to speculate that the causes for some of these may lie in the specific combinations of preferences which define this complex type. For instance, there can sometimes be a "tug-of-war" between NF vision and idealism and the J practicality that urges compromise for the sake of achieving the highest priority goals. And the I and J combination, while perhaps enhancing self-awareness, may make it difficult for INFJs to articulate their deepest and most convoluted feelings.
Usually self-expression comes more easily to INFJs on paper, as they tend to have strong writing skills. Since in addition they often possess a strong personal charisma, INFJs are generally well-suited to the "inspirational" professions such as teaching (especially in higher education) and religious leadership. Psychology and counseling are other obvious choices, but overall, INFJs can be exceptionally difficult to pigeonhole by their career paths. Perhaps the best example of this occurs in the technical fields. Many INFJs perceive themselves at a disadvantage when dealing with the mystique and formality of "hard logic", and in academic terms this may cause a tendency to gravitate towards the liberal arts rather than the sciences. However, the significant minority of INFJs who do pursue studies and careers in the latter areas tend to be as successful as their T counterparts, as it is *iNtuition* -- the dominant function for the INFJ type -- which governs the ability to understand abstract theory and implement it creatively.
In their own way, INFJs are just as much "systems builders" as are INTJs; the difference lies in that most INFJ "systems" are founded on human beings and human values, rather than information and technology. Their systems may for these reasons be conceptually "blurrier" than analogous NT ones, harder to measure in strict numerical terms, and easier to take for granted -- yet it is these same underlying reasons which make the resulting contributions to society so vital and profound.

Post Christmas disaster..

77000 deaths.. the latest number I came across since Sunday.. the tsunamis had indeed racked havoc and the death toll is still on the increase..keeping track of the news update simply makes my days gloomier than the one before.

26th dec- 8.5 earthquake news was reported. I felt little other than treating it as a more severe natural disaster than others

27th dec- earthquake and tsunamis..the incident came across as a ‘live’ geography lesson that is constantly updating itself and relating my textbook-experiences with these real life scenarios..scary.

28th dec- the wreckage caused by the tsunamis keeps rolling in and the rising death toll in the affected areas is increasing at such a rapid rate that everything seems so dream-like.. news report also stated that the earthquake has such a great impact that the world map needs to be redrawn. Oh my gosh!

29th dec- Quite affected by then…hooked onto the online news for updates..the dreamy feeling is still present..especially when thousands and thousands of bodies retrieved from the sea are shown to be relocated onshore for identification. The large numbers simply stunned me. Too real to be true.

30th dec- feel the full impacts of disasters and their aftermath that I usually see from my notes only today. The beautiful phi phi island that we learn as a tourism case study is now a devastated and useless area..the beauty and attractiveness of the sea side resorts will definite be shaken after this catastrophe. The once ideal choice of building a sea side resort as close to the sea as possible is no longer appealing for many I believe.sigh..

Dead bodies, missing people, rotting corpses as well as injured people in remote areas..just hope that all the sufferings will come to an end really really soon.

to ALL mY GAL-frens (email)

To all of you~ A young wife sat on a sofa in Bukit Timah on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother.As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter."Don't forget your girlfriends," she advised,swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. "They'll be more importantas you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how muchyou love the children you'll have, you are still going to need girlfriends. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them. And remember that "girlfriends" are not only your friends, but your sisters, your daughters, and other relatives too. You'll need other women. Women always do."'What a funny piece of advice,' the young woman thought.'Haven't I just gotten married? Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake, a grown up, not a young girl who needs girlfriends! Surely my husband and the family we'll start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile!'
But she listened to her Mother; she kept contact with her girlfriends and made more each year. As the years tumbled by, one afteranother, she gradually came to understand that her Mom really knew what she was talking about. As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, girlfriends are the main stays of her life. After 50 years of living in this world, here is what I know about girlfriends:
Girlfriends bring you chicken curry and scrub your bathroomwhen you need help.
Girlfriends keep your children and keep your secrets.
Girlfriends give advice when you ask for it. Sometimes youtake it, sometimes you don't.
Girlfriends don't always tell you that you're right, but they're usually honest.
Girlfriends still love you, even when they don't agree with your choices.
Girlfriends laugh with you, and you don't need canned jokes to start the laughter.
Girlfriends pull you out of jams.
Girlfriends help you get out of bad relationships.
Girlfriends help you look for a new apartment, help youpack, and help you move.
Girlfriends will give a party for your son or daughter whenthey get married or have a baby, in whichever order that comes!
Girlfriends are there for you, in an instant and when thehard times come.
Girlfriends will drive through blizzards, rainstorms, hail,heat, and gloom of night to get to you when your hour of need is desperate.
Girlfriends listen when you lose a job or a friend.
Girlfriends listen when your children break your heart.
Girlfriends listen when your parents' minds and bodies fail.
Girlfriends cry with you when someone you loved dies.
Girlfriends support you when the men in your life let youdown.
Girlfriends help you pick up the pieces when men pack upand go.
Girlfriends rejoice at what makes you happy, and are ready to go out and kill what makes you unhappy. Times passes. Life happens. Distance separates. Children grow up. Love waxes and wanes. Hearts break. Careers end.Jobs come and go. Parents die. Colleagues forget favours. Men don't call when they say they will.
BUT girlfriends are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girlfriend is never farther away thanneeding her can reach. When you have to walk that lonesome valley, and you haveto walk it for yourself, your girlfriends will be on the valley's rim,cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on yourbehalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end. Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you. Or come in and carry you out. My daughter, sisters, mother, sisters-in-law, mother-in-law,aunties, nieces, cousins, extended family, and friendsbless my life!The world wouldn't be the same without them, and neither would I. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other. Every day, we need each other still..
I love you all so much. haha

bELatED xMAs upDAte

Wah!!days since I last updated..haha..the whole of last week was havoc and fun!!all building up to a wonderful Christmas that was spent with section..we went kite flying and ended off with the tree flying the kite for us..really funny..by the time we left the place..the fact that the tree was still flying our kite high up in the sky made the whole scenario creepy..yee..haha

Christmas eve was initially peacefully spent with huifang and yijing and her sis at coffee club..saw clara..she cut her hair! Haha..a rather freshened look but a lot more mature..guessed she didn’t see me..it was a nice session sia..feels great to catch up with each other..haha..after spending half a day at coffee club, we continued our “chat” outside ngee ann city..with a vibrant and noisy crowd right next to us on the streets..direct contrast sia..no wonder Frankie cant stand the sight of us..rotitng there..haha..walked down the street after that..turned out to be a green snowman..with foam and spray..not a bad experience though..fun though dirty. Took pics and neoprints after that..supposed that these are frankie’s last few pics with his “beautiful” hair..haha.
Nice Christmas! Oh ya..the fantastic class Christmas dinner on the eve of the eve is not to be forgotton..though only a couple of us turned up..i enjoyed and really appreciate the efforts put in for it..heehee..

~ReaLLY frUItful DayS!~

Tired..marathon all the way..from chalet to christmas gatherings..i have not been at home for more than 12 hours for the whole week…home seems to have became a place that is just supposed to provide me with a bed to rest before setting off for a long long day..have not talked and seen much of my parents for days..cos by the time i reached home..they will already be soundly asleep..next morning..dad will leave home even before i wake up..miss him!!haha...really ironic ya..living in the same house but have really really little interactions...with work taking the lead followed by gatherings and sumptuous dinners! Need to trim down le!! Exercise is needed!! Sleep too!! Guilty guilty.. I m turning a panda by Christmas..sigh..at first glance..i might be a stupid fool packing myself with these outings without getting enough rest.. but on second thoughts..i am actually a lucky gal..being able to meet my different groups of friends ranging from section to 2d to my primary school frens..so happy to see them..and the most valuable thing is that everyone is still their same own self..making the outings as enjoyable and fun as before! I supposed it is this kind of feeling and blissfulness that push me on despite the weariness..and tonight..i am going to the class xmas party!! It has been weeks since I last saw them..rather looking forward..though I am really really tired..mentally.. think that explains my sotong-ness this few days.. oh no!!
Though section chalet has come to an end, I still miss everyone and the things we did!! looking forward to see you guys again soon!! Poor wenwei..though I am busy enjoying myself..i never forget ur injury ya..will visit u soon buddy!! Sorry! Hope to see you for Christmas actually..have a speedy recovery!!

SlackEr

Working now..heehee..sorry for slacking but the hotline has been pretty cold recently..haha…the working environment is not too bad…with pretty nice collegues..easy to get along with =) one thing that differentiates work from school is the need to think of the next day’s attire every night…headache!! Haha…nonetheless,it helps to polish my dress sense and gives me the chance to play mix and match in my wardrobe..haha..coming up with new combinations of attire! =)

Miss a lot of people..hope to have frequent gatherings but I am pretty lazy to organise!! Can somebody please do the job? Actually I want to take the initiative to organise..but everyday I will be really tired after work le…see how ba..guess many people are busy with work like me.. anyway..to all out there..take good care till we meet!

12/12/2004-- a day to be remembered forever!

Haha..my first blog, first entry, first time playing at explanade, first time having ALL my different groups of friends attending and supporting my concert..really elated!!! Section rox,band rox..audience rox,Ms chan rox..we ROX!!!haha..so so so happy..Really really dun want today to ome to and end..now still chatting with setion online..love you lotz!!!love the flowers given by my best pals too!!! thanks so so so much for coming..feel blessed with ual around..let me start from the beginning...
Early morning met weizhen and xinpei at interchange..as usual..the one living closest the interchange was the latest*tik tik* Was a rainy morning..cold and wet..took 180 and xp brought us through a short cut to arrive faster at yuhua..Everyone was gathered at the canteen..ready and noisy..soon we all board our respective buses..i began to sleep..or rather..try to sleep..cos i slept at 3plus the night before...tearing away early in the morning..looked bad..Btw..hope my efforts paid off yeah? Though the key chain abit the lan pong..hope you guys like it! =) Reached explanade at around 940..so excited..as we unload and bring our instrus in..cant help but to stick my eyes on everything i can lay them on..want to take a close and good look at this fantastic place.. though seems sua gu..but i dun care!!it is a one in a life time chance leh..haha..After exploring and unpacking into our respective rooms..we got ready for the rehearsal..though it was just a rehearsal..i still cant get over the fact that this rehearsal is my first playing in the explanade!!Gave my best! haha..though the whole band went chaotic at certain parts..i feel that i have played alright for my individual part..feels good..haha..
After the rather exhaustive rehearsal.. it was time to makan!!As usual,our section took our time and started taking photos when everyone scrambled to the dining lounge for the meal..haha..As the last section to eat..Jinzhan,yiyang and wenwei tan dio..got so much leftovers and extras for them!!Really overwhelmed by their power to eat!!Jinzhan esp..still must conserve one! Ultimate!!haha..Took some candid shots of them and they are really candid..haha lame.. anyway..time flies and soon concert was near to its start..excitement filled me! Heard that the queue outside was long and i really felt fortunate and lucky to be given this chance...Jia you jia you was what that kept flashing into my mind!! haha..
Going onto the stage was so dream-like and beautiful..with a surrounded pool of audience..both in front and behind me..i felt like a super star!!haha..or rather a super band member..haha..so so so grand and big the hall is..excitement is an understatement..no words can described my emotions at that point of time..in addition..i saw waving hands and they are my losest frens'!! Huifang,yijing,marcus,frankie,kimcheong,javin,james..thanks for coming!! though i didnt get to see wing,alexis,fab and dan.. i felt their presence through the sms!!haha..thanks thanks!!haoped ual enjoyed the performance as much as i have enjoyed playing for ual!!Yanwen also turned up with ian and yanfang..woohooo!! Last but definitely not the least..qingwei and siew yan!!haha..and qiaofang and xuan and ah lam and other rvband seniors and so many many..thanks for coming and hence making a full house concert possible! =)
In a twinkle of an eye..the concert came to an end..a really really shortlived but memorable experience!!Never enjoyed performing so much..no fears and no sweat! haha..Great job everyone!!all the stupid mistakes were cleared..and enjoyment was pushed to our fullest!!Looking forward to play for Sparks 3!!Keep this alumni spirit burning..proud to be part of u..though the conert has ended..out spirits were stiill high and
burning!! Flashes didnt stop flashing backstage..my smiles nearly become numb and my eyes blinded..but all were to be given with no complaints..packed up everything and left the place hastily and this fast way of leaving did not bring to end all excitment..partying continues outside the explanade..as for my sections..all the guys bang sei us..but nvm..the cool and steady gals made our way to jp for a filling and satisfying dinner at Fish & co..wohoo! Talked and crapped and laughed like the restuarant belonged to the 5 of us..camped under a nearby HDB block for a few hours after that..took photos as if we were at a hotel with poses and funny stances..cool~haha..so much fun! Love you guys~looking forward to our chalet..our xmas and our countdown! We are really happening sia!haha..
Cant really bear to sleep..dun want to forget this wondeerful feeling! wah!!!!haha..though i am sad that Sparks 3 only me and xp confirmed playing so far..i still wish u xiao guas conentrate on your studies k? jia you and will welcome ual back with open arms again soon! Blur and funky Sl..hope that u can play..jinzhan too..if possible qiao fang and xinru too!a realli long but definitely not tiring day for me! yeah!